So I come home, open my fridge Praying that some of the Sexy baingan bharta my cook made this morning was left over. No such luck. No egg. No Maggi. All that's there is very old cold bread and some Mexican Mirchi cheese spread.
So I toasted two slices and ate them with the spread and some juice (not much of which was left in the carton, still). Well first I put them in the toaster, pushed the thingy down and ran to the loo to wash up so I can eat my 'dinner' all clean. I come back and the toast isn't nice hot and toasty. I go, 'shoot I broke my flatmate's toaster'. I push the bread about a bit, push the thingy a bit more. Change the timing. No luck. Then, stroke of genius, I decide to try another plug point. This is when I notice that I hadn't turned the switch on. It worked, the bread even got burnt a little.
Did I ever, ever claim to be an all-time bright person? Then?
Moving on. I proceeded to do some gift research online. Attempted to buy something from Amazon. Which charged me murder for shipping but I'm pretty sure that thing I bought cannot be bought here anywhere. Yes I am pretty sure. I checked some Indian websites.
Really. Ok well, if it can be bought here, I'd feel pretty stupid. There. What do you want from me.
Moving on. I then got bored of my research and decided to play GOD OF WAR (I) (its in brackets because it's actually just GOD OF WAR, but subsequently came GOD OF WAR II and GOD OF WAR III, not sure they were expecting that. ok I am rambling). The damn game is quite violent, not to mention, ahem, quite X rated (?). Well, there are naked women involved. Both God women and mortal women, naked. Semi-naked. Ok, anyway, the game is quite violent. So whenever they want to make Kratos (the main chappie) do something particularly difficult looking, they don't trust you to carry out a series of moves. Instead you're asked to press O. Then the game directs you to press a number of buttons as and when they appear on screen and then does all the hard work itself. Silly game. I enjoyed it.
Well except for one part, whenever they want to test your skills and make you do something like Kill a MEGA MONSTER (they're not actually called that), they required you to press one button (say O) REPEATEDLY. And the faster you do it, the better your chances of killing said MEGA MONSTER. I of course took this very seriously. As a result, many MEGA MONSTERS dead and my right arm is barely functional.
Also, I don't think Kratos ever dies. Or maybe I'm just a super sexy game player (no but seriously, I don't think he ever dies). He kinda looks like one of those guys from that dumb show. Roadies. But sexier. and more grey with a GIANT red tattoo thing.
Ok here.
No?
So after all the hard work and faffing (described above) I'm back to feeling hungry with no food. I think I should just drink some water and go to sleep. Man, I would love a veggie burger right now
YES, THERE IS such a thing as a vegetarian burger. Don't bug me now. Good night